Personhood Stories

We hope these personhood stories comfort and encourage you that you are not alone, as well as inspire and embolden you to share your story with us.

One mother, early in each of her pregnancies had a dream where she saw a naked baby (for gender ID). The babies born alive to her matched the gender in the dream she had earlier in those pregnancies. So she assumed the gender of the pregnancy-loss baby was the same as revealed to her in the baby dream. No scientific proof—just belief.

Another mother told me she realized her son loved music because every time she listened to music while pregnant with him, she could feel him dancing inside her. And her elementary-aged son does like dancing to music. Experiential proof confirming a prior belief.

Write your child’s story in our book, Other Side Of Grief.

One had written about the determination of her terminally-ill son to keep living long enough to be born alive.

One dreamed about seeing all of her children (living and deceased) in their proper birth order and genders (though some of the lost ones were not scientifically confirmed).

One dreamed that her son introduced himself to her and told her she never got to meet him.

One man testified about seeing a girl who said she was his daughter and offered him forgiveness for him having her aborted…

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One confided hearing her son tell her that he didn’t look like the decaying body she last saw and then seeing a time-lapsed video of his development since his death until what would have been his age at that point.

One occasionally hears “Mommy” and the sound of a girl running around the house.

One occasionally dreams of a girl that is age appropriate for her loss, and she believes it’s her daughter.

One saw her little girl walking towards an angel.

Another also gets visited by an age-appropriate girl in her dreams, and she also occasionally feels her hair get pulled while she drives.

 
Reveal additional stories by clicking on “Continue reading” above.  

One admits to feeling crazy for claiming to know the gender of her son based on a dream where she’s using their chosen boy name (read What to Name Your Child).

One tells of their surviving twin always talking to someone before bedtime, and that twin relaying a dream about the one that didn’t survive (read Womb Twin Survivors).

One dreamed of a relative coming from heaven and taking her baby back up with her on the miscarriage day.

One who complained of cramps during pregnancy was visited by a boy who apologized for the pregnancy cramps and who told her he knew she loved him (read Mysteries, Miracles, and Faith).

One had a vision of Jesus holding her baby.

One claims mother’s intuition in saying she had a girl.

These brave souls admit to an unscientific, unconfirmed knowledge about their children, going beyond grieving the loss of a future with their children. When first running across them, I did not think to take note of their source and do not mean to quote them, so if you recognize your story—please, please submit your story to Miscarriage Moms For Life so that it can be properly heard. Have a similar story? We’d love to include it on our site.

 

 

 

 

 

If these stories helped you, attending our Memorial and reading our books, When Unborn Babies Speak and Other Side Of Grief, may bring you some additional comfort.

 

 

 

 

For those pondering whether you should bother naming the child you lost in pregnancy, Miscarriage Moms For Life heartily recommends, “Absolutely!” For those who have already decided not to bother, we ask you to prayerfully reconsider as you keep reading below.

 

 

 

 

 

Some purposes of names include: 
• Readily identifying us from the crowd. While we may ignore an occasional “Hey, you,” we almost immediately recognize our name and reflexively react to hearing it. 
• Linking us to our reputation, like a brand. When a recognized name is said, others react based on the associations they make with that name. 
• Affirming our place and position in our families. Our children are ours, even though they are not physically with us. 
• Conveying a sense of dignity, respect, and recognition as humans—being made in the image of God (read Our Babies Are Made in the Image of God).

Remember the scene from…

To learn more, read our book, Other Side Of Grief.

You may already be using a nickname for your child, like little bean, blueberry, little angel, or anything else. Great! Continue to say it with all the fondness you wish to convey. But giving your child a proper name denotes a level of seriousness and respect (read What to Name Your Child) that nicknames lack. It may sound like this: “We named our son in heaven David, but I like to call him my monarch butterfly because his first movements were like flutters.”

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Naming your child validates their importance to you and their worth and dignity as a fellow human being. Naming your child tells others that this was not a clump of cells or a product of conception or less than human. Naming your child expresses that they were a real human being with a soul, that you love. Some won’t understand this. But name them anyway—for your child and for yourself.

Naming your child signals…

To learn more, read our book, Other Side Of Grief.

Miscarriage Moms For Life emphasizes the importance of naming your child because God made them and loves them. Name your child because you love them and they deserve it.

What to Name Your Child

Whether the decision to name your child was a no-brainer for you or whether it was a difficult decision, Miscarriage Moms For Life both compliments and welcomes you to this discussion. Deciding on a name is a big responsibility. While family names may change due to marriage, most people don’t change their given names, so it’s a lifetime decision.

Don’t stop with a nickname. While this may be tempting, give your child a real name—a “legal” name, even if you cannot register that name with a hospital or human government.

What to Name Your Child

When deciding on a name for your child, consider…

Read our book, Other Side Of Grief, for another helpful tip.

If you’ve already decided on a name for the child of that pregnancy, consider sticking with it. Keeping the same name may signal to others that the child that died is irreplaceable, and you will always love that child. If you are feeling undue pressure to reserve that name for a child you get to interact here on earth longer, then figure out another name that will honor the memory of the child in Heaven (read My Baby is in Heaven).

Read more of What to name your child?...
  Consider naming your child as unique and different from their siblings. Try to avoid names that seem to provoke sibling rivalry. Remember that you hope that their siblings will like to say the name of their brother or sister in heaven.

 

 

 

 

 

Give your child a name that—if given a private internment—you will not regret seeing on their grave marker or tombstone twenty years from now. That is the sobering reality for us. Even if you were not able to provide that, Miscarriage Moms For Life hopes to raise the funds to provide all pregnancy loss children with gravesite recognition (read Why Rocks), so consider choosing a name that will last longer than we will at such a site. Name them with respect, dignity, and love.

This may be a great opportunity to…

Read our book, Other Side Of Grief, for additional information.

Consider giving your child a name with…

Read our book, Other Side Of Grief, for heartening information.

 

Attend a Miscarriage Moms For Life memorial for more on this topic, or read our book, Other Side Of Grief. Find more validation in reading our book, When Unborn Babies Speak.